What you MUST register for & why ~~ PART 1

Simply put, there are some things you are going to want, some things you are going to need and some things you won't be able to live without. Here is my professional mommy opinion on what you should register for.... in no particular order:

1) Excersaucer: It is a place to put your baby, help him learn to balance, but most importantly keep him entertained for 30mins to an hour. I find myself moving it from room to room... its stays stationary so I will put it in the kitchen while I do dishes or even the bathroom while I shower.

personal fav: $99.99

Baby Einstein Discovery Center Entertainer - Around the World

2) Bottles: This is kinda obvious, but you are going to need them to feed the baby, regardless of if you breastfeed or not. At some point you will move to bottles. If you do breastfeed you are going to want to register for the fatter bottles, or the ones that basically resemble a boob. Since I didn't, I stuck with the longer skinnier ones. I highly suggest registering for both kinds, they will likely get put to use either way it goes. Register for AT LEAST 3 packs of each kind. And you will end up buy more, but its a great start.

Personal Fav: Playtex Ventair... Like these because they are easy to assemble and it just makes sense to me that the angle they are shaped in allows for less air, thus less gas...

If you breastfeed or plan to get these:

If not you can use these, these happened to be the only kind Dylan would drink from. For some reason he does not like fat nipples apparently:)

Also.... with nipples, register for extra and register for all types of flow... fast, rapid, slow. Why? At first, when they are learning to suck, they need slow flow nipples, obviously so they don't choke. As they get a bit older and get the hang of it, you are going to want faster flow. Also, for milk, you may want a faster flow and for juices, slower. Since milk is thicker than water or juice. PLUS you can never get enough extra parts of bottles. So register for them!!

3) Diapers! Clearly, you are going to need these. Pick the kind you want, but I suggest for new moms pampers swaddlers. The reason is that they are the only kind of diaper that show you when you need to change diapers. When its dry there is a yellow line, when its wet it turns blue. This only comes in sizes N - 2 - but don't worry, by the time they are in 2's you will know when a diaper is full:) Also, keep in mind that newborns are only going to be in N's for about 2-3 weeks... they move to 1's quick and grow out of each size about every 2-3 mths from there....

4) Burp Clothes! You are going need TONS of these, especially for the first 6 mths. They will probably litter your house, but register for several packs of them... and you will still need to buy more.

5) SOUND MACHINE

What? Its a machine you keep in the nursery that make white noise sounds (ocean, rain, heart beat, etc) that helps the baby sleep. (See my entry Sleep Baby Sleep Please for why you NEED one for sure) `

A popular kind that you will see is the little lamb & if you get one or register one, they are great. The only problem is that they are battery operated, so I highly recommend the kind that comes with a plug. Obviously, you don't want to find a miracle that helps you baby sleep and run out of batteries in the middle of the night. At our house, its on 24/7 in Dylans room and he now can't sleep without it. But hey, I can't sleep without a fan so...

Where? Most everything I buy for baby and EVERYTHING i found for this entry I found at Babys R Us... but this one... I do recommend going with a nicer not necessarily "baby" sleep sound machine so you can know that it will last. This one is a Brookstone though and it is specifically for nurseries.

6) LEAP FROG PUPPY PAL

This goes along with the sound machine, but we have this little guy and its great for weekend trips, trips to grandmas or maybe a dinner at a friends house where you have to put the baby down to sleep for a little bit while you are there. You pinch the guys little foot 3 times and it sings your baby to sleep... both Dylan and my nephew love it and can't get to sleep away from home without it.

7) Things that you will find yourself buying over and over are paci's (if your baby is a paci baby) ~~ and paci clips. They say that if you breast feed your baby will prefer these kinds of paci's : notice the slant on the nipple:

If you do not breastfeed... your baby is "supposed" to prefer this type... with the rounder nipple. This particular kind is the best for us because it seems to suction to his mouth better, the way the outer plastic part curves and is open for... well all the spit to get out:) But like the bottles, register for a ton of both kinds, Dylan likes ALL pacis.

8) SWING & BOUNCY SEAT!

Honestly, the brand itself doesn't matter, but you could probably register for 2 and cross your fingers that you get both. Because until your baby can sit up by himself (about 4-6 mths I'd say) ~ the only place you have to put your baby is in the bouncy seat or swing. The swing is not exactly easy to transfer from room to room... but this seat is. You can put the baby in there in the bathroom floor while you shower, prob him up on the middle bed in it while you dress... or the center of the kitchen table while you cook.... on the coffee table while you are doing laundry... its a for sure MUST have. When you pick out your seat look for:

1) a cushiony soft bottom so that when they start to kick, they don't bruise their little legs.

2) If you get one that rocks.... you won't be able to move it around like I just said from place to place. Because you don't want them rocking right off the table:)

3) Easily replaceable batteries that require easy to find batteries.

4) Lightweight enough to carry in one hand, while carrying a baby in the other.

5) Colorful stimulation for above the babies head. We bought the cute one with brown monkeys... Dylan did not care to stare at drab brown monkeys so we had to get another one.

I found this fun bouncy seat & there was a swing that matched it.... its super high tech about the same cost as the ones we bought for Dylan... most likely I will get both of these for my next 2 babies. Because the My Little Lamb we did get (which looked so cute and cuddling) was also white and got mighty dirty. I liked both of these because you can wipe clean & they have enough covered soft leg room for baby to kick... and they are super high tech..... I found these at SMART MAMA... they don't carry them at Babys R Us last I checked...

http://smartmomma.com/files/cache/de64ae6f545dd038b2100253562fdc82.jpg

http://smartmomma.com/Peg-Perego-2011-Sdraietta-Melodia-Musical-Chair-Iris-p-20456.html

9) BABY SHAKESPEARE!!!!!!! WORLD OF WORDS SPECIFICALLY!

I have probably pushed this item too much as is... but its for a reason!!! GET IT!!

10) SLEEP SACKS!!!!!!!!!!!

When people would ask me after Dylan was born what they could bring me... I always asked for more of these. They are GREAT for late night diaper changes... no snaps, no zippers, no problem. Register for all sizes too 0-3, 3-6, 6-9 and I'd actually register for at least 5 - 10 of each size. And you will still buy more...

The two I suggest are:

Make sure to register for BOTH long sleeve and sleeveless of both.... do the math from when your baby is born (EX... Dylan was born in March.... it was just getting warm... so for 6 mths I only needed the sleeveless.... but needed long sleeve ones as it got cold... make sure to also get the warm fuzzy kind for BOTH seasons (sleeveless or not) because baby needs to stay warmer than we do in order sleep better)

AND ~~~ baby sleep gowns

Thats all for now... but I am sure I will think of more.... stay tuned for PART 2 :)

No means NO!! Seriously....

At first it was cute, saying no to Dylan and he just smiles back totally clueless. Now its becoming such a nightmare, he does not understand regardless of my tone or serious expression. Its also starting to concern me that when he goes to stick his finger in a socket and I yell no from across the room, my poor child will get electrified.

This morning Dylan was pulling up on the gate that we have set up to block him from the stairs. This is a constant problem. So I said no, Jon walked in he said no, Jon firmly picked him up and put him down about 2 feet from the gate. To which Dylan started to cry and immediately went back to the gate. We did this for 10 straight minutes with absolutely no progress.

I've taken some much needed steps to research how and when to teach your child NO. Thought I'd share.... I found this information from baby websites, mom forums and pediatric websites. You'll be able to tell which ones are the mom's advice... Essentially what I learned is to keep doing what I am doing and tough it out for another 6 mths because he isn't going to get it until then.... Fabulous!

1

Watch for times when your baby is about to do something inappropriate.

2

Stop her before she completes the action by telling her 'no' in a firm, but loving manner.

3

Express your concern and displeasure through your facial expression more than through your voice. Loudness or harshness may scare your infant.

4

Use some type of hand motion, such as a shaking pointer finger or the American Sign Language sign for 'no'. Use this sign each time you say 'no'. This will reinforce what 'no' means and help her to respond even faster.

5

Imitated what might happen if she did the inappropriate action. For example, if she is about to touch a hot mug, pretend to touch it and then burst into tears. This will show her that the action will bring great discomfort and she will most likely avoid that action in the future.

6

Tell her 'no' consistently when she is about to do something inappropriate. Hesitating from doing this because you feel you are being too negative could cause her to get mixed signals and misinterpret what 'no' really means.

7

Avoid creating fake situations. If you set her up in a situation and then scold her for responding to it, she will be confused, frustrated, and unable to respond to 'no' appropriately

8

Consistency is especially important for toddlers. If Mom's computer was off-limits yesterday, it should be off-limits today. And don't worry about repeating yourself. A toddler may need to hear something literally a hundred times before he gets the message.

9

Think of discipline as a form of teaching, not a form of punishment

10

make it as easy as possible for your child to do the right thing. Try to avoid putting him in situations he can't handle. For example, don't take him on long shopping trips when he's tired and hungry. And don't surround him with things he's not allowed to touch. If his world is cluttered with temptations, you'll spend all day saying "no." Try to maximize his opportunities to play and explore but minimize his chances to get into trouble.

11

That is WAY too young to start discipline.
He/she will not understand what is going on.
Wait until he/she is able to talk and communicate.
The only thing you can do is stop them from doing what you don't want them to do by removing them from the situation, and I bet they will go back so you will have to do it over and over...

12

Understand that, at this age, baby is beginning to learn the word no. Only use it when you mean it, and expect baby to challenge you on it every time for a while. For example, be sure to use the word no when she's unsafe. This will help her understand the concept faster.

13

During the earlier months, baby will do things like pull hair and such when she's really just trying to show you affection. When these moments come along, say, "No! No!" in a sweet tone and try to replace the action with something that is positive like a kiss on the hand.

Read more on FamilyEducation:http://life.familyeducation.com/baby/discipline/44249.html#ixzz1JE0AxnJx

Oh, right... I have a baby

I feel like I say this over and over again... but its so crazy to think about how much has changed in 2 short years. My life has changed, my marriage has changed, my career, my personality, my body, my family, my relationships, how I spend my time, what I enjoy to do, who I enjoy to hang out with, how I see the world.... just about everything that possible could change in a person's life - has. To me, change is good... but when so much changes in such a short time - it sends a person into some form of shock. Not like the kind of shock where you can't feel your fingers or anything like this, but more like a numbness to your thoughts and emotions that slowly trickle back into being able to feel them again as time passes and you are more accustomed to the changes.

So now that Dylan is one year old, and I've had exactly 374 days to adjust to being a mom, plus of course the roughly 300 days I spent pregnant and adjusting to the thought of a totally new life and body... I have all together had 674 days to wrap my head around Betsy's life Part 2. Sitting here right now on day 674, I can honestly say.... I've never been happier. Sure it took a long uncomfortable, difficult & sometimes painful road.... but as my mother once said to me... the sweet just isn't as sweet, without a little sour.

I think I've pretty clearly outlined throughout this blog, exactly what the sour has been for me. I think I have even gotten across the sweet too.... but sometimes when I talk about being pregnant or being a mom, I feel like what comes across is how difficult it is. How much changes... I feel like sometimes I portray a little more sour than sweet. For example, I was recently in Miami visiting one of my very best friends in the world & I found myself talking about motherhood and from the look on her face as I was talking, I realized I might just be talking her out of ever having a baby. I was saying how once you become a mother, you can never, ever, ever again go somewhere else & be totally 100% present. Because, wherever you go, if you are not with your baby - a piece of you is missing. So while I am sitting on a boat, in the middle of crystal blue ocean, drinking corona in the gorgeous sun... in the back of my mind I am thinking of exit strategies for Jessica & I should the partying get a little out of hand. Because I need to be safe & healthy in order to be a good mother... so if something happens to me, it equally happens to my child, therefore nothing bad can happen to me, because it will heavily effect my son. Its a vicious circle. And I am explaining this to one of the freest spirits I know, so the thought of being tied to another soul to such an extent, understandably brought fear to her poor heart.

The only way I can counteract this wave of fear I have just brought upon her, is to just speak from my heart. Because as a person who can usually find a way with words, its incredibly difficult to express the depth of love, peace & happiness I have found in motherhood. I think just like anything else, its easier to voice the downfalls of things, while the best things in the world usually don't have words to accompany them. So here goes...

I used to love sleep... adore it... treasure sleeping. At some point I remember questioning if I one day will look back on my life and regret sleeping so much. Today, while some days its more difficult that others to wake all the way up... sleep has much less priority in my life. If I am jolted out of bed at 2am by a crying baby, my heart is awake and in his room faster than my feet. Sleep... the thing I onced loved and treasured... does not hold a candle to my role as a mother & my love for my child. Ok.... hmmm.... I feel as though to a person who is not yet a mother, this may also come across as something to jot down on the negative side.... so let me keep trying....

My marriage. My relationship with my husband has become a bond that I never thought existed. And for those of you who know me, you know I fell madly in love with my husband, to a depth that I had never experienced and many of my friends didn't understand, and never looked back. So for me to say that my love has gotten even deeper... thats saying something. We share this bond that only the two of us understand, this love, this connection, this mutual respect for the other as a parent.... this precious relationship that only the other one has, and no one else in the world can share with us.... and that just elevates our love to a whole new arena. Sweet right?

Days. My days are filled with messiness. With Elmo. With repeating the same 5 actions over and over. But I am never bored, rarely stressed, and always always smiling, singing, and happy. Ok, ok, sure sometimes I am a total zombie. Never get out of my PJ's, shower at 4pm, forget to brush my teeth... totally focused on someone else 100% of the day... but somehow, I don't really mind 96% of the time. This, compared to my old life where I used to struggle with whether or not I would ever be happy. Or whether or not I just really enjoyed misery on some sick level.... now, I can say happily... I am happy.

So I guess there isn't really a great way to describe it. Why I am happy, how I am happy, why being a mom is so great. I think you just have to experience the total joy of watching your baby balance on his own feet for the first time, or the hilariousness of getting pureed peaches sneezed in your face. Describing it so that you can understand it is like putting the horse before the cart... you just can't. You just have to trust me.

Dylan's birthday I remember looking at him delving into his elmo cake, in a room full of people staring at him with cheesy grins and pure joy... and thinking, its going by too fast. I need to stop the clock because I am scared I will blink at this time will be gone. And that scares me because, I have found such joy in these simple times.... I never want them to end. And just to be able to say that a year has flown by.... that in itself is telling of the joys I have found in being a mom. A YEAR used to be like... this really long time.... and now, its been a blink. Time flies when you are having fun. And flying it is.